Dear eBay sellers.
We have a bit of a mixed relationship, don’t we? On
one hand, you provide me with the overpriced bits of cardboard and oddly shaped
lumps of toxic metal that I crave so badly. On the other hand, you do cost
me a lot of money, and sometimes one of you tries to pull some dodgy tricks,
like offering stuff at low prices, but then overcharging for postage, or
canceling an auction after it’s ended, if you aren’t satisfied with final
offer.
In the end, however, most of you are fine chaps, and I
feel like we all appreciate these little toys. That is why I’m never surprised,
but always glad, that you go to such great lengths to protect my purchases. We
understand that the fine postal workers of the world don’t always share our
delicate touch, and so it is up to us to protect the objects of our affection
during transit.
Why, when you send me a batch of minis, it’s not
unusual for one of you to place every single figure in a separate Ziploc bag,
then wrap them individually in bubble-wrap, and place it all in a sturdy
cardboard box, surrounded by those little foam thingies. Truly outstanding dedication.
It is also why, when one of you decides to post a 25
year old, and relatively rare, box, wrapped in nothing but a single layer of
brown paper, I’m not only baffled but also somewhat disappointed. If I then
find that the box has been taped shut, using normal office tape, so that I
either have to cut it open and live with patches of tape on my game, or try to
rip it off, thereby risking further damage to the box, I’m inclined to be
outright annoyed!
So, dear eBay sellers, I hope this sad affair won’t
repeat itself. It would not do for our relationship to be tarnished so.
Love
Croaker
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